Extraction

The Procedure

By the time of my retrieval procedure, I was more than ready to have the few follicles I'd managed to muster up whipped out. I knew I would be under light sedation for the procedure and needed someone to drop me off and pick me up, and that I would only be out for an hour or so. However, I was nervous nonetheless. 

I was not allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight the morning of my procedure, which was scheduled for 8:30am on Sunday morning. I was due at the clinic at 8 so the best friend a girl can ask for picked me up at 7 so we could trek out to Health City. 

When we got there, I was taken to a patient recovery room, put on a sexy robe, hat and booties and was set up for my IV. When everyone was ready I went into the procedure room and set myself up on the bed with my legs laid up gracefully on stirrups (It's hard to be graceful with your legs in stirrups but pretty sure I nailed it). I was provided with a sheet to cover my modesty but at this point I felt like the sheet was unnecessary given where the doctor was about to head with a needle....


Once we were all set, I dozed off with the sedation and the Dr did his thing. This involves inserting a needle through the vaginal wall into the ovary. It then goes into each follicle and pulls out the fluid and egg inside, one by one. Everything online says you don't feel or remember anything. No doubt written by middle aged white men who have never had an ultrasound and needle probing their internal organs and smooshing swollen ovaries. While I do not recall feeling the needle, I definitely remember stirring and feeling the ultrasound (or something) pressing on my ovaries. It wasn't painful per se but very uncomfortable. And it was the first thing I remembered when I woke up.

Outcome of the Procedure

About half an hour after the procedure, I started to wake up and was monitored by the nurse for the next hour or so as I came in and out of consciousness, with regular blood pressure checks etc. I then had a catch up with the doctor and nurse to discuss how it went (accompanied by my friend as I was still bit woozy from the anaesthesia, so wanted someone in the room who might actually remember the interaction). 

My procedure went well and I was told that they had retrieved 9 eggs but did not yet know how many were sufficiently mature to freeze. I was told I would get a follow up call from the embryologist the next day and a follow up call with the doctor to discuss this cycle and the next in 7 days' time. 

The next day, I received a call confirming that 6 eggs were viable for freezing. This number was not unexpected by this point - I had been well prepared by the medical team for the likely outcome. But disappointing nevertheless. I still had a smidgeon of hope that maybe all of them would survive.  Surely the universe owed me one? Alas, the universe begged to differ.  If we plug those numbers into the sad calculator, 6 eggs at my age gives me only a 50% chance of ONE live birth. And that's assuming my eggs are the quality of an average 34 year old. 6 eggs for a 38 year old brings the chance of one live birth down to 30%. What did I tell you? Saddest. calculator. ever. So let's move on to a brighter subject - my post-procedure pain!


The Recovery

I was warned by the doctor and nurse that I may have cramping, pain and some bleeding for the next few days and would be bloated until after my period which would come around  in 7-10 days (because the only thing missing from this entire sordid process is another period). When we left the clinic, my friend took me to her place to keep an eye on me (this was involuntary - she refused to take me home and I was too tired to argue - see comment above re best friend a girl could have) where I variously laid on the couch, napped in the guest bedroom, and was waited on hand and foot. I would recommend this approach - it was nice to be looked after and a pat on the head every now and then does wonders for the soul. 

Over the next few days I continued to have pain and sensitivity in my lower abdomen. Imagine you've been kicked in the ovaries. Several times. By a horse. A big one. It was worse when I sat down for too long, or needed to go to the bathroom and I spent much of my time with my trusty heat pack on my stomach. It was worst at night when I was trying to sleep as I usually sleep on my side but found that particularly uncomfortable. I also found it hard to walk quickly or longer distances, found it hard to concentrate for a full day and tired easily. I usually had a nap in the afternoon and was in bed every night for a week by around 8:30 or 9:00pm #partyanimal (OK to be fair that's not too much before my normal bed time). 

Given everything online says you'll be back to normal the next day (those goddamn middle aged white men again), I was fairly frustrated to be crippled for almost another week but on the exact day my amazing nurse Dawn said it would, the pain disappeared. Once I hit day 6, I woke up and the pain was gone. I still felt bloated and full but was no longer unable to move freely. I've never been so happy to be merely uncomfortable! 

And with that, cycle 1 was done. I have a 3 week break then back for round 2. Can't wait!


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